Tommy Joe

When I was around 10 years old we found out mom was going to have another baby.  That was pretty exciting to us girls.  We thought of the new baby like a doll... the baby would be so much fun.  Around that time Judy was getting interested in "boys" and babysat for the Palmers.  Grace Palmer was fairly normal.  Her husband was in construction and got killed unloading a tractor from a lowbed trailer.  But Grace really took Judy under her wing so to speak.  Judy did a LOT of babysitting for Grace and even got to go on a couple of vacations with the Palmers.  To add a little extra to this... Grace had a brother by the name of Tommy.  Judy really had a crush on Tommy Palmer.  She loved his 49 Ford.  She really just "loved" everything about him.  He was just so mature, so interesting!!   I didn't get to go...but one time Judy went to Tahoe with the Palmers and Tommy went along.  Judy told me that they dressed her all up and she and Tommy went to a casino together.  It sounded so exciting to me.  Anyway, back to mom and our new baby.  We all got in on the discussion of what to name the new baby.  Judy (of course) wanted to name him Tommy if he was a boy.  Since my dad was called Tommy a good part of his life, Mom and Dad thought that was a good name.  We kids all knew Tommy Joe was really named after Tommy Palmer!!   Anyway, mom had to go to SF to have Tommy Joe... there wasn't a Kaiser Hospital in Marin County.  I remember us going there to see her one time.  I think she might have been in the hospital for a week or so.  Mom and Dad both seemed really thrilled to have a second son---after us 4 girls.  And...us 4 girls did treat Tommy Joe like he was a doll.  I remember taking an stroller (the old metal type) and hooking it up to my bike and pulling Tommy Joe all over Novato.  I have no idea how old her was, but I know he wasn't very old.  I took him uptown, I took him on the dirt roads, I just took him everywhere.  Since I only had the old stroller hooked to my bike...each time I stopped he'd bang into my bike.  I finally decided if I put a couple of board along the rope, then the stroller wouldn't hit my bike.  I loved my bike!!!   I could take a bike apart and put it back together with no problem.  I was such a tom-boy I always HAD to have a boys bike....no sissy girls bikes for me.  All of us girls played with Tommy Joe, we totally loved that little brother.  Mom REALLY favored him.  We knew that right away.  But then, mom always thought us girls were a bit wild.  I can remember when we get in a fight out front with any of the neighbor kids...she come out and yell..."what have you girls done to that poor kid"...like it was always our fault!!!   One time we went camping in the Sierra Nevada Mountains.  We were all setting up camp and someone put Tommy Joe on the table to sit while we were busy.  Well..he fell off.  That was the first time I ever heard my mom cuss.  She yelled "you damn girls, can't you watch your brother".  We were so shocked!!   He wasn't hurt... how far is it from the picnic table to the ground?   When Tommy Joe went to school Dad decided that Tommy Joe would go to SDA schools all his school days.  Poor Tom had to ride a bus from Novato to Santa Rosa each day!!!   School took up his entire day back then.  Tommy Joe did learn to read on a bus, play games on a bus and he got along with all the other kids on the bus...so he had a fun time commuting.  I'm not so sure that he got a good education...but Dad felt like he was doing the right thing.  Since Dad felt like Don was a total failure, I guess he wanted Tommy Joe to be a shining star SDA boy!!     That sure didn't work out!!! 
When Tommy Joe went to Pacific Union College he finally rebelled.  One day he and a buddy got drunk and sat out in front of the dorms acting like typical drunks.  Obviously he got kicked out of that upstanding college.  He went on to start his own business-- a collection agency with a friend.  It did quite well.  Then he sold off his share and bought a printing business.  It did OK also, but somewhere along that time he decided he needed to simplify his life and thought moving to Reno would be good for him and his family.  NOT!!!  He ended up divorcing Lisa, dropping out of sight and we have no idea where he is today.  Tom was probably one of the smarted people I had known.  He could do anything.  He was super good on the computer back in the day when you had to program your own programs out of DOS.  He was fun to be around, everyone loved him.